I haven't kept this up too well. RL is not always kind. My daughter came out OK with the cyst, it was removed and seems to be the end of that, I hope.

  My son has a new gf, they moved out in September, so I now have my home sweet home back again. There are no words for how good it feels to be alone again, well, almost alone. I babysit grandkids from 5am to 12:30am all week, ( I do get a little more sleep in the mornings, Jaklyn wants to sleep more so we have a slumber party in the livingroom) I have Jaklyn weekdays, and the two oldest babies all week, usually get Saturday off, and I have them Sunday evening, so, yeah, I get one day off if I am lucky.I can't get anything done while the babies are here or they will do things to make me regret it!

  The two older ones seem to be going through some sort of separation anxiety or something. I don't think they are getting much attention at home, when they get here they tend to climb up on my lap and curl up in a ball and cuddle up as close as they can. But then, they were so very young when they came to live with me, maybe they are having issues with living away from me, I was pretty much their constant caregiver the whole time they lived here for over a year. Kyle turned 2 a few days before they moved, and Caitlyn will be 3 in a few weeks, Jaklyn turned a whole year old in August. Oh, and I seem to have another one on the way, due in April, yeah, my son is again gonna be a dad.

  The gf does not seem to have what it takes, but maybe she will be OK after the baby is born. She is very very self centered, her father was an attorney for one of the big three auto makers, she is quite accustomed to having her own way, and tends to tell her friends how to live. I mean, she was screaming at one of her friends because they were trying to save their marriage, and she didn't like the wife, she was FORBIDDING him to try to make his marriage work! This is usual behavior from her. I have already learned she lies ALOT, has no ability to take care of money and bills ( but she sure does buy alot of clothes and stuff for her!) She has complete control over my son, we barely speak any more, and we used to be very very close. She has convinced him that I am the worst person alive, that I steal stuff from them, am the biggest slob in the world, yeah. That is just the beginning. I know he will pull his head out of his rear-end eventually, but it is nerve shattering to stand by and be treated like this and see him treated this way. She shows many signs of abusive personality, I really hope I am wrong, I WILL protect my family.

  To keep myself as sane as possible, I have started making homemade soaps( CP ), bath products, cleaning products, and working with herbs and oils. I plan to start a small home business selling the soaps and bath stuff eventually, and in the spring I am planning to sell herb plants, tree seedlings, and that type of stuff. ShaylaK plans to help me with the herbs. I use many of my herbs in my homemade soaps also, and using healing plants in them.  When the jewelweed gets going next summer I will be making jewelweed soap for poison ivy and itchies, I already have some on ice to try my hand at the lotion. my hold up is money to get started. I plan to make lots of this type of stuff for xmas for family gifts for practice, and I have several pounds of soap made and cured. I am considering not using molds and hand carve them, that would make every soap unique. After x-mas I will begin buying ingredients and stuff that I will need to get started as I can, and getting plant seeds to get started for spring.

  So, that's my life as of late. Never a boring moment, although I really wish I had a little more boredom! 

I am about to fall apart. My daughter Tonya just called me, she had a doctors appointment after she picked Jaklyn up today. It was to have some tests done on a lump in her breast that has been there for over two years. The doctor she had kept telling her it was just a cyst and not to worry about it. The midwife and prenatal doc both told her the same thing. It was getting painful, and she was developing awful headaches. she went to get it all checked out, and they said it was NOT looking like a cyst, and it must come out.She has to go to an ultrasound( she can't do mamagram due to breastfeeding) and she will meet the surgeon on Jaklyns birthday next week. They are not sure if it is cancerous, even if it isn't then it is something bad that has to come out NOW. TWO YEARS she was told not to worry. She has to break Jaklyn of breastfeeding immediately due to drugs she will have to take. I am numb and scared half to death. I tried hard not to cry on the phone and be strong to listen to her, not easy when you hear news like this.I am so far in shock that I cannot think.

 HUGS, COMFORT AND MORE HUGS FOR YOU ALL.

   This was not written by me, it was forwarded. 

 mothers

If you send this to just one person, it should make it all the way around the
world by Mother's Day.

This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their
arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying,
"It's alright honey, Mommy's here."

 

 

 


Who have sat in rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies who can't
be comforted.

This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and
milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purse.

 

 

 

For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween
costumes. And all the mothers who DON'T.

This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see. And the
mothers who took those babies and gave them homes. And for the mothers who lost
their baby in that precious 9 months that they will never get to watch grow on
earth but one day will be 

reunited with in Heaven!

This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on their
refrigerator doors.

 

 

 


And for all the mothers who froze their buns on metal bleachers at football or
soccer games instead of watching from the warmth of their cars, so that when
their kids asked, "Did you see me, Mom?" they could say, "Of course, I wouldn't
have missed it for the world," and mean it.

This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store and swat
them in despair when they stomp their feet and scream for ice cream before
dinner. And for all the mothers who count to ten instead, but realize how child
abuse happens.

This is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and explained all
about making babies. And for 

all the (grand) mothers who wanted to, but just couldn't find the words.

This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat. For all
the mothers who read "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a year. And then read
it again. "Just one more time."

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoelaces
before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted for Velcro
instead.

This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to
sink a jump shot.

This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little voice
calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring are at home
-- or even away at colleg e.

This is for a ll the mothers who sent their kids to school with stomach aches
assuring them they'd be just FINE once they 

got there, only to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to
please pick them up. Right away.

This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can't find the words to
reach them.

This is for all the step-mothers who raised another woman's child or children,
and gave their time, attention, and love... sometimes totally unappreciated!

For all the mothers who bite their lips until they bleed when their 14-year-olds
dye their hair green.

For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the mothers
of those who did the shooting.

For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of their TVs
in horror, hugging their child who just came home from school, safely.

This is for all the mothers w ho ta ught their children to be peaceful, and now
pray they come home safely from a war.

What makes a good Mother 

anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad hips? The ability to nurse a baby,
cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time? Or is it in her
heart? Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear
down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time? The jolt that
takes you from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. to put your hand on
the back of a sleeping baby? The panic, years later, that comes again at 2 A.M.
when you just want to hear their key in the door and know they are safe again in
your home? Or the need to flee from wherever you are and hug your child when you
hear news of a fire, a car accident, a child dying?

The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for young
mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation... And mature
mothers le arning to let go.

For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.

Single mothers and married mothers.

Mothers with money, mothers without.

This is for you all.

For all of us.

Hang in there.

In the end we can only do the best we can.

Tell them every day that we love them.

And pray.

Please pass along to all the Moms in your life.

"Home is what catches you when you fall - and we all fall."

Please pass this to a wonderful 

mother you know. (I just did.)

Someday when my children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates a parent, I will
tell them, as my Mean Mom told me: I loved you
enough . . . to ask where you were going, with whom,
and what time you would be home.

I loved you enough to be silent and let you
discover that your new best friend was a creep.

I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours
while you cleaned your room, a job that should have taken 15
minutes.

I loved you enough to let you see anger,
disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children must
learn that their parents aren't perfect.

I loved you enough to let you assume the
responsibility for your actions even when the
penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart.

But most of all, I loved you enough . . . to say
NO when I knew you would hate me for it.

Those were the most difficult battles of all. I'm
glad I won them, because in the end you won, too.
And someday when your children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates parents, you will tell them.

Was your Mom mean? I know mine was. I had the
meanest mother in the whole world! While other kids
ate candy for breakfast, I had to have cereal, eggs, and toast.
When others had a Pepsi and a Twinkie for lunch, I had to eat
sandwiches.
And you can guess my mother fixed me a dinner that was
different from what other kids had, too.

My Mother insisted on knowing where I was at all
times. You'd think I was a convict in a prison. She
had to know who my friends were, and what I was
doing with them. She insisted that if I said I
would be gone for an hour, I would be gone for an hour or less.

I was ashamed to admit it, but she had the nerve
to break the Child Labor Laws by making me work. I had to wash the
dishes, make the beds, learn to
cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, empty the trash
and all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she would lie
awake at night thinking of more things for me to do.

She always insisted on us telling the truth, the
whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the time
I was a teenager, she could read my mind and had
eyes in the back of her head. Then, life was really tough!

My Mother wouldn't let our friends just honk the horn
when they drove up. They had to come up to the door
so she could meet them. While everyone else could
date when they were 12 or 13, I had to wait until I was 16 .

Because of my mother, I missed out on lots of
things other kids experienced. I haven ever
been caught shoplifting, vandalizing other's
property or ever arrested for any crime. It was all her fault.

Now that I have left home, I'm an educated,
honest adult. I'm doing my best to be a mean
parent just like my Mom was.

I think that is what's wrong with the world today.
It just doesn't have enough mean moms!